"SEA, Me"

"Names are the first gift you give a child." That's what a friend's mother told her as we talked about her Igbo and my Khmai name. I have so many poems and journal entries about my name. It has been a journey to accept, love, and fully own the name I was given.

"Rhummanee" is derived from a Sanskrit Buddhist word that can be interpreted as "state or place of joy". My family name means, "phoenix". When I was a kid, I was bullied and race came up a lot. I decided I wanted to be called something more Western sounding. Many refugees and children of refugees do this. Immigrants, too. They choose an "American" name. I wanted to feel as if I belonged where I lived. This piece is about how reclaiming my name is also a reclamation of my history, culture, and identity, and all of its intersections and complexities.

Call yourselves whatever you want. For me, I'm so good with the meaning and reason for my name. I am not exchanging or replacing my parents' gift to me for the convenience of others.

The creation of this video was hella impromptu. I wasn't planning on being in front of the camera for real, definitely wasn't thinking about shooting something to put out there this day. The creator of this video, my dear friend and soul sister Imerald Brown and I just wanted to mess around with her camera and we ended up with this. I wrote this piece in 2012. Hella long ago. There's a lot in this poem I would edit or expand on today. A lot of things I've redefined for myself. It is what it is, though, and I'm happy my friend and I got to do this together.