Cecilia Wen Choreography - Floetry - "Say Yes"

Happy birthday Aquarius friends! I just turned 35. Time is wild, right?

Before I began this new trip around the sun, I spent some time looking through and reorganizing a bunch of dance files from last year. It was a big year for my growth as a dancer. Even though dance isn't new to me, I had a lot of confidence stuff to work through. It had been years since I'd trained as consistently as I have been in the last 3 years. I wasn't a mom before and my body looks and feels differently now. I really had to get more comfortable being and moving in my body.

I feel like I can call myself a dancer again. Move in Touch's Divine Femininity workshop by Cecilia Wen in Oakland last summer was definitely a highlight, one I never got around to sharing publicly until now. I was definitely proud of myself for how I ended strong because I struggled a little at the beginning. Here are some reflection points I want to highlight and things I tell myself when I'm on the floor.

1. Recovery, recovery, recovery.
   I messed up, and it showed! I'm not trippin' off the fact the mistake is on film. I am disappointed that I let it show all over my face. However, I caught it and killed it. I could've let it mess me up mentally for the rest of the piece, but I didn't and kept going. This is a note to me to breathe through it and give myself the space to recover from it more gracefully next time. Mistakes are going to happen. It's about how I bounce back.
2. Forget about the camera.
   It is there but I don’t have to look at it. Filming groups is something that has become common in dance workshops and classes. It definitely wasn't the norm when I first started dancing in the early 2000s. It is optional, and 95% of the time, I will choose to do it. For growth. Truthfully, it used to make me nervous. It felt like a lot to both execute the choreography and perform specifically for the camera after 1.5-2 hours of instruction. My mom-brain couldn't handle it. I always tell myself, Let Tessa (or whoever is filming) do their thing and I’ll catch them when I’m ready to. Is connecting with the camera a skill I want to be better at? Sure. But it is a different skill and I don't want to put that pressure on myself when I don't have to. It is more fun that way.
3. If the song is on, so am I.
   It is hard, and it is something I try to practice. That means moving (or not) with intention when the music comes on. That also means I don't walk off until the song is done. For a moment during the freestyle, I do remember thinking, Damn Cece, are we fading this out soon?! Really though, I felt good about how I ended, and I could’ve kept going on that particular day. It's also always a plus when you know the song and vibe.

Look, if Cece is in town, I'm there if I can help it. And if I'm ever in LA on a night she is teaching, I will absolutely try to catch her. I'm grateful that she is a part of my journey. I can say it has definitely made a difference in how I show up in class.